ShipWreck
The sky was graceful lit by stars that someone spilled, our heads were filled with sweet dreams.
Those dreams soon turned into nightmares when an iceberg crashed into our ship.
Those dreams soon turned into nightmares when an iceberg crashed into our ship.
We woke up from the loud terrifying noise, realizing that the ocean was consuming our ship.
Figuring out a plan fast, we started nailing wood over the hole, but fighting with the water was already hard enough. The spot just grew and grew, we were losing hope fast, but drowning even faster, which is all I remember. Until, I woke up on an island with everybody else.
Figuring out a plan fast, we started nailing wood over the hole, but fighting with the water was already hard enough. The spot just grew and grew, we were losing hope fast, but drowning even faster, which is all I remember. Until, I woke up on an island with everybody else.
Your first sentence (end) doesnt really flow the last few words. Also the story is a bit all over the place. Try reading it over because when I read it it was, stars, dreams, storm, storage, hole, island. Try to connect the sentences together!
ReplyDeleteYou are doing a great job!!!!
Creative story, but it seems kind of confusing. Especially in the middle.
ReplyDeleteYour story was pretty good. Your story was a little confusing though. Were you dreaming? Because it said that you woke up on a island. And you used the word ship a lot of times in your story. But, your story was good and I like how you used creative words like: consuming, and graceful. But in the first sentence of you story it says: the sky was graceful lit by stars that someone spilled. What do you mean by someone spilled?
ReplyDeleteRainbow Sunshine: we were on a ship sleeping because it was night time. I mean there is a lot of stars like someone spilled them all over the sky.
ReplyDeleteNice story very creative.
ReplyDeleteIt's a creative idea for a story
ReplyDelete